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Lindsay Lohan is a Sucky Babysitter

News Flash: Lindsay Lohan’s family is a mess. L&S says:

“Considering Lindsay Lohan’s history with drugs and alcohol — including arrests for drunk driving and cocaine possession, along with multiple stints in rehab — the last place the star should be hanging out is a bar. But what made her 11:30 p.m. outing to LA’s Crown Bar on Sept. 4 especially shocking was Lindsay’s companion: her 15-year-old sister, Ali. “I couldn’t believe Ali was there,” one guest tells Life & Style. “They partied until after 1 a.m., and she treated Ali as if she were just one of her friends at the club with her. And Ali was excited to be there. She loved being out on the scene with her sister. It was as if she knew she belonged there.”

The girls’ father, Michael Lohan, thinks Ali’s strong enough to resist temptation. “I’m glad Lindsay and Ali remain so close,” he tells Life & Style. “However, they’re independent people and are capable of making their own decisions.”

But Ali’s already in dangerous territory. Near the end of last year, she stopped going to school, and Lindsay took her in. “Ali is enrolled in a homeschool program,” mom Dina tells Life & Style. Now, despite an eight-year age difference, the sisters are like twins, dressing alike, looking shockingly skinny and sporting plumped-up lips. “Anything Lindsay does, Ali wants to do,” a family insider says. Ali’s also witness to the chaos of Lindsay’s romance with Samantha Ronson. Early in the morning of Sept. 12, the couple had one of their regular blowouts and split up yet again, says the family insider.”

It’s a shame Lindsay’s little sister looks old enough to be Lindsay’s mother or else I might have a heart and feel sorry for her, but let’s get real. At her age, Ali should know better. Her AARP card has limits.

Lindsay Lohan is drowning her sorrows over her breakup with Samantha Ronson in a sea of men — and some friends are terrified she’ll go down the road Britney Spears traveled two years ago. Except that, unlike Spears, Lohan doesn’t have a stable family member to lean on. The faux lesbian has been “a complete and utter wreck” since Ronson broke it off with her two weeks ago, and has been spending time with “a different man every night,” said one concerned friend. Some of the guys include “90210″ star Kellan Lutz — who “has been out of town this week, but they are in constant contact,” the friend said — as well as British paparazzo Chris Jepson. On April 15, Lohan and Jepson were inseparable at a Hollywood Hills house party. According to a spy, they even went into a bathroom together and didn’t come out for quite some time. Friends fear that Lohan is in a “meltdown” situation and has no career to fall back on. Lohan, who can’t get an acting gig because of her antics and the high cost of insuring her, is said to be interested in joining the burlesque “Peepshow” at the Planet Hollywood Resort & Casino in Las Vegas. The show stars former Spice Girl Melanie Brown (Mel B/Scary Spice) as mistress of ceremonies Peep Diva, while Kelly Monaco is Bo Peep, the Diva’s timid protégé. Lohan joined the duo backstage after catching the show Saturday night and approached the director about a part, which would require her to appear topless. Meanwhile, since the Ronson split, the former starlet has not only gone back to men — she’s also gone back to partying all night, every night. Last week, she hit six clubs in one evening. Lohan doesn’t have a rep and her former publicist didn’t return calls.

Lindsay Lohan’s only answer to anything is sex and booze, so of course she’s going to be bar hopping and head bopping. She’s like the porn version of Little Bunny Foo Foo. At this point I wouldn’t even rule out field mice in Lindsay’s party plan.

Lindsay, her floppies, and her sister, Ali, shopping on Melrose this week: